Saturday, December 09, 2006

Handbrake

Sorted

Dancing animals

DIY automatic cat feeder

IRN-BRU Snowman

An advertisement.



For Scotland's favourite sugary carbonated drink.

Tommy's 12 Days Of Christmas

For little Jam Wilfrid Veitch.

Joel and Jacqui Veitch from rathergood.com made this video for Tommy's because this is a subject that is very close to their hearts.

When their son, Jam, died earlier this year their eyes were opened to the vast vacuum of knowledge around prenatal and neonatal death. They were astounded that in the UK 17 babies a day are stillborn or die within the first four weeks of life, and in over 60% of cases the cause remains unknown. That's a heartbreaking amount of precious lives lost, and a huge number of parents that have experienced the devastation they've gone through this year.

This kitteny celeb-fest of a video brings you some of today’s biggest stars, all supporting Tommy’s 12 Days of Christmas.

Tommy’s exists to save babies’ lives because right now in the UK, one in four women loses a baby during pregnancy or birth. By 2030, they want to halve the number of babies who die during pregnancy.

Tommy's 12 Days of Christmas is a variation on this festive classic, with a range of possible activities for those who want to support them in December and January.

We want Santa!

Christmas wish list

He asked.



He got.

Marksman called in to kill Kingston’s pigeons

Scroll down to the comments.

The Ultimate Rejection Letter

Sincerely,

Chris L. Jensen

The Right Reverend Tom Butler - The Bishop of Southwark

The story as reported by The Sun.

'Steaming drunk' bishop shame.

A Bishop was so drunk he climbed into a stranger’s car before falling out and bashing his head, it was claimed last night.

Nicola Sumpter, 33, said the Right Rev Tom Butler staggered from a function into the back of her Mercedes.

She said the Bishop of Southwark, 60, tossed out her baby’s toys and refused to leave the car outside a South London bar on Tuesday night. Asked if he had been drinking, he replied: “I am the Bishop of Southwark. It’s what I do.”

When her husband Paul pulled him out, he allegedly fell and cracked his head.

The bishop’s spokesman last night admitted he could not remember what had happened.

And as reported by the BBC.

Bishop mugged walking to his home.

The Bishop of Southwark has been mugged near his home in south London.

The Right Reverend Tom Butler had his mobile phone, briefcase and spectacles taken in Tuesday night's attack near his house in Streatham.

A spokesman said: "He does not remember very much at all. He got a bump on the back of his head.

"He is OK and is in good spirits. He is back at work and really wants to downplay it." The bishop, 66, was walking home from a church event.

Update: On this occasion it appears that The Sun's reporting of this event may well be closer to the truth, as reported in The Observer and the Sunday Mail.

Birth control

Christmas lights

In the name of Christmas cheer Bernie and Denise Lumsden from Bristol have decorated their house with 40,000 bulbs in a dazzling display, which must rack up an impressive electricity bill. Inside they have also abandoned the concept of 'tasteful touches' festooning their living room with tinsel, teddy bears and even a snowman.



Whilst Eric Rodemeyer, of Marshalltown, Iowa, has an amazing display using ninety-six separate channels on his computer to flip on and off 14,500 bulbs, synching up his lights with music.

The planning took him up to 150 hours for each of his seven songs. Onlookers can hear the sounds on their FM radios.

With video.

Update: There's a link to another impressive lightshow with sound in Ohio here.

Thanks Shaun!

Malaysia: Workers can abuse their bosses

It's OK to use derogatory and vulgar language about your superiors in the office as long as it is done behind their backs, a Malaysian court has ruled.

The Industrial Court said a secretary at Malaysia National Insurance Bhd. was not guilty of misconduct when she sent e-mails from the office computer to friends, griping about her superiors, the national news agency Bernama reported.

Court chairman Syed Ahmad Radzi Syed Omar said Ratnawati Mohamed Nawawi's sacking for misconduct was unjust, and the court awarded her back wages and compensation amounting to $18,570.

"The court agrees that if those derogatory, insolent and impertinent (words) are used toward the superior officers directly it would construe a serious misconduct on the part of Ratnawati," Syed Ahmad Radzi was quoted as saying.

"But if those words or language are only used behind their backs and only between a few friends it would not be a misconduct. Those words are not meant to be heard by the senior officers," he said in a 12-page judgment.

Overloaded Pants End Shoplifter's Escape

A teenager arrested for shoplifting had filled her pockets with so many items that her weighted-down pants dropped to her ankles as she tried to run out of the store.

Cheyanne E. Dwiggins, 18, is accused of trying to steal several pieces of candy, kitchen utensils and a 15-ounce box of strawberry Nestle's Nesquik from Bauer's Market in Lapel, about 25 miles northeast of Indianapolis.

Store employees became suspicious on Wednesday when Dwiggins, who had been in the store about 30 minutes, walked to the cash register to pay for a 59-cent candy necklace, but only had 40 cents.

Store owner Scott Law had watched Dwiggins and knew she had pocketed several items, so he confronted her as she tried to leave the store, according to court papers.

Dwiggins tried to run from the store, but he grabbed her coat from behind and held onto her until police arrived.

When Lapel Police Chief Dennis Molina pulled up, he saw Dwiggins' bare behind as she tried to escape from Law and back out of the door, her weighted-down pants at her ankles.

Police found a potato peeler, ice cream scoop, a set of measuring spoons, two cake decorating gel tubes and six Rollo candy bars on Dwiggins. At the Madison County Jail, a deputy removed a can of Nesquik that Dwiggins had placed in her crotch.

Reality show turns B-list celebrities into gun-toting cops

Just when you thought that reality TV had reached the end of its natural life and the pot of mindless, vapid "concepts" had finally been emptied, along comes Armed and Famous.

The idea, courtesy of CBS television, is simple. Take a bunch of minor celebrities, give them guns, train them to use said weapons, give them a police uniform and badge, and send them out to uphold the law on the streets.

These new "recruits" as reserve officers are La Toya Jackson, Michael's sister, Jack Osbourne, son of Ozzy, and the skateboarder and Jackass star Wee Man. Also taking part are Erik Estrada, star of the television series CHiPs, in which he played a motorcycle cop, and Trish Stratus, a former wrestler . The series is being filmed in Muncie, Indiana (population 66,000), chosen for its quintessential middle-America features. The city's police are doing the training.

The celebrities are shown firing in the gun range and learning how to stop people in their cars and on the streets.

The pelican who fell in love - with a woman

A pelican has fallen in love with the wildlife officer who nursed it back to health.

The pink-backed pelican, a native to sub-Saharan Africa, escaped from a wildlife park on the Isle of Man in October and flew to Northumberland, where it was found suffering from blood poisoning.



Having been taken into care by the Scottish Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (SSPCA), the bird soon started to show signs of affection towards Alexis Bailey, one of the charity’s workers. It displayed mating rituals whenever she entered the room and bit others who approached.

Ms Bailey, 47, who has worked at the SSPCA for eight years, said yesterday: “We responded to a call to take in a sick pelican in October, and I was the person on hand. I came in, gave him his antibiotics and got him settled down for the night. He seems to have been in love with me ever since.

“He looks right into my eyes and puts on what I can only describe as a mating display, with his wings up and his head bowed down. He’ll walk over to me, snuggle in and preen me. He loves to take my hair or my hand in his mouth and he also plays with my shoelaces.”

Silent night for banned carollers

Carol singers have been banned from wards at Torbay Hospital because it is feared they could bring infections in with them.

Torbay Gospelaires male voice choir, which has taken Christmas cheer to patients for 40 years, called it "political correctness gone mad".

Hospital bosses said they could sing in public areas such as the restaurant or the main entrance.

But the Gospelaires say they will not be taking up the offer.

Half the population of England do 'no exercise'

Half the population of England do no sport or active recreation, a poll of more than 350,000 people reveals.

Just one in five adults, mainly young wealthy white men from the south-east, does the recommended 30 minutes of exercise three times a week.

People from the Scilly Isles are among the most active, while those in areas hosting the London Olympics, like Newham, are among the least active.

There's a detailed breakdown by region here.

Friday, December 08, 2006

Cake

Man Faints During A TV Cookery Show

It's good to see everybody all rush at once.

Take your own photo without the help of strangers

Introduction to growing your own furniture

All you need are three saplings, a plywood jig and a little patience.

It takes about five years.

Deputy 'Elf' Helps Nab Speeders In Orange County

Santa may reward the nice, but, Thursday, one of his elves was punishing the naughty. The elf happened to be an Orange County sheriff's deputy and he gave a little extra sting to some speeding tickets.

Richard Lockman stands 5-foot-6. He's dressed in green and red. He's wearing tights. And he even has pointy shoes. But he's no ordinary elf.



"I'm Santa's helper today, helping to save lives so we can help these people enjoy their Christmas, so their families can enjoy their Christmas without the tragedy of traffic crashes," Deputy Lockman told Eyewitness News on Thursday.

With a sign that said, "Help An Elf - Slow Down," Lockman clocked the speed, while an army of 20 little helpers bagged the speeders along University Boulevard near Pelee Street.

The Orange County Sheriff's Office got a complaint call that it wasn't right to use Santa to stop speeders. But Lockman was no Santa, just an elf armed with a radar gun.

With video.

Santa 'shot Jesus out of saddle'

Bah Humbug! isn't good enough for Jimmy Wright.

The Metchosin artist, known for his paintings of stylized polar bears, has put an effigy of Santa Claus on a cross on his front lawn to make a statement about the orgy of consumption in the modern world.



Above Santa's head, Wright has inscribed the words 'Sumptum Fac Donec Consumptus Sis'. Roughly translated, Wright said, it means 'Shop till you drop.'

"Santa represents frivolous consumption," Wright said yesterday, standing at the foot of the cross beneath the outstretched red-suited figure. "That's all he is. He shot Jesus right out of the saddle. He's the focus of Christmas."

Executive dies in faulty jacuzzi

A German executive died in a whirlpool bath at a Singapore apartment after being sucked to the bottom.

Police did not release the name of the victim, who was in his late 30s and had recently arrived in the city-state but The Straits Times newspaper named him as Arndt Starke, the Asia finance director for German firm Schott AG.

The Straits Times said Mr Starke was found with his stomach stuck to a suction drain in the whirlpool.

A grille over the hole was broken and he had apparently been sucked to the bottom, it said.

The newspaper said his fiancee, who was also in the pool, had screamed for help but the suction was so powerful that four men who tried to rescue Mr Starke could not pull him out.

Bald as a coot, cat hoping to steal the show

Nearly 20 years after it came to Britain, the sphynx has finally been recognised as a breed by the Governing Council Of The Cat Fancy.

Sphynx cat

It can therefore compete for the first time alongside 750 other cats at the National Cat Club's annual championships at Olympia on Saturday.

The sphynx was first brought to Britain from Canada by Jan Plumb, 62, from Enfield, in 1988. She said: "It's a natural mutation. The first one was born in the mid- Sixties in Ontario."

A breeder of Siamese cats mated the hairless male with its mother which produced half a litter of hairless cats and so the sphynx was developed.

Miracle recovery of severed head boy

A boy whose head was effectively severed from his neck in a racing car crash "which should have killed him" has made a miraculous recovery.

Chris Stewart, 12, suffered an internal decapitation, separating his skull and neck, when he hit a barrier at a track near Alton, Hampshire on 24 September.

His father, John Stewart, said he did not realised how serious his son's injuries were until the paramedics put him in the ambulance and took him to Southampton General Hospital with a police escort.

"They said he had broken his neck. [The impact of the crash] had actually taken the skull off his neck," he said.

Mr Stewart said: "The doctors had never seen this kind of injury because, they said, when it happens, people die instantly.

"Apparently, only six people are known to have ever survived this and my son is the only one to have recovered [this well]."

More here.

Devon boatshed sells for £402,000 - Update

A boatshed in an exclusive yachting resort in south Devon has fetched £402,000 at auction.



Auctioneer Bob Petit said the shed exceeded the £250,000 guide price after "lots of lively bidding".

The waterside shed, with green painted double doors and a sloping corrugated iron roof, is situated between two other buildings in Salcombe.

Mr Petit, of Charles Head & Son, said the sum was a record for a property of its size in the area.

There were seven or eight bidders for the boatshed, which eventually went to a Devon man with interests in the resort who is also a keen yachtsman.

McDonald's forced to shut from lack of patronage in healthy town

McDonald's is closing its outlet in a town known for quality food and healthy, local produce.

The fast food chain in Tavistock, Devon, simply wasn't being used enough by locals.

So after seven years struggling to make ends meet in a town that has won many accolades for the quality of its food, McDonald's will finally shut up shop on Saturday.

John Taylor, chairman of Tavistock EatWise campaign, said: "Because of the quality of our local food McDonald's has not been able to compete."

A McDonald's spokesman said: "As part of an ongoing review of our restaurant sites, it has become clear that the location of McDonald's in Tavistock is no longer suitable."

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Monkey Business

Cheeky Monkeys

How To Be The Perfect Boyfriend

Jerome Murat

This is French mime artist Jerome Murat.



I'm impressed.

There are some suggestions as to how he does this here.

Guinness guzzling camel crashes Christmas party

Staff at an Irish riding school were forced to postpone festivities after Gus the camel chomped his way through 200 mince pies and several cans of Guinness intended for their Christmas party.

Gus, starring in the riding school's Santa's Magical Animal Kingdom show, helped himself to the feast while staff were getting changed for the party.

"Gus found his way out of his pen and helped himself," Robert Fagan, owner of the Mullingar Equestrian Centre in central Ireland, told Reuters.

The 11-year-old camel, originally from Morocco, cracked open six cans of Ireland's famous stout with his teeth after the door to his stall was left open.

Gus appeared well after Monday evening's feeding frenzy, Fagan said, adding: "We were all looking forward to it, but you couldn't blame him. He's really a very gentle, docile sort of camel."

FunSlides



Just strap them on and go.

Man Fined for Tossing Pig at Hotel

Kevin Pugh, 20, of Cedar Bluff, has been fined $279 for tossing a pig over the counter at the Holiday Inn Express in West Point. Pugh pleaded guilty to a charge of disturbing the peace.

West Point Police Lt. Danny McCaskill has said Pugh didn't know the employees of the hotel. There was no evidence intoxication was a factor.

No one was hurt, including the pig, officers said.

Pugh is accused in a second animal-throwing incident at a Hardee's restaurant. He has pleaded innocent to disturbing the peace in that case and will appear in city court on Dec. 19.

Rickshaw pullers reach end of 'inhuman' road

Rickshaw pullers, like this man, could soon be out of work after the Indian city of Calcutta banned the trade as inhuman.

Rickshaw

The vote was boycotted by the Opposition, but Buddhadeb Bhattacharjee, the West Bengal Chief Minister, told the state legislature: “In the 21st century it is not right for a human being to pull another human being.

“When I go to Delhi, Bombay, or abroad, I am asked how long Calcutta will have hand-pulled rickshaws. This is inhuman.”

Calcutta is one of the few places in the world where the hand-pulled rickshaw, brought to the city by Chinese traders in the 19th century, is still used. China banned them when the Communists took over in 1949. Rickshaws will be used until a compensation plan is negotiated for the city’s 387 licensed pullers.

Dog tunnels through snow to save owners

A seven year old German Shepherd - Timberwolf mixed dog named Shana is quite a canine hero in Alden as the story spreads of her efforts to save her owners during the October surprise storm.

Eve and Norman Fertig, who are both 81 years old, were out treating injured birds in the Wildlife Sanctuary on their Alden property on the night of October 12th. They left as the storm intensified but, were soon trapped by falling trees and heavy snow as they tried to walk back to their home. Eve realized they could die in the bitter cold but, fortunately, Shana was with them.

As the cold and snow chilled them both without heavy coats and gloves, Shana started digging under the snow and trees.

The dog actually dug a foot wide tunnel about 20 feet to the home.

Shana barked but, the couple hesitated, so they say the dog came back and tugged on Eve's jacket. She says the 160 pound dog actually pulled her onto its broad back and crawled through the tunnel. Her husband held on as well as they slowly crawled all the way back to their home. They made it back to the back deck, opened their door and fell in to the house exhausted but safe.

With video.

Bat Has Longest Tongue of Any Mammal

In the cloud forests of the Andes a funnelled flower has inspired the most spectacular tongue of any mammal on the planet.

At around 9cm, or 3.5in, the extraordinary proboscis of the tube-lipped nectar bat, Anoura fistulata can reach 150 per cent of its body length. After use it retracts into its rib cage.

Bat tongue

This is longer, relative to body length, than that of any other mammal known and second only to the chameleon among vertebrates.

The degree to which the bat can extend its tongue is equivalent to a cat being able to lap milk from a bowl placed two feet away.

The animals evolved to feed on the flowers where the nectar is hidden at the end of long funnels called corollas.

Fortune in fat

A Norwegian businessman is looking to earn money on the fat of the land, and create fuel in the USA.

Lauri Venøy wants to use the product created from liposuction to develop bio-diesel.

Bio-diesel can be produced from plant oils and/or animal fat, and the Norwegian sees the scheme as a renewable energy source, newspaper Dagens Nærinsgliv reports.

More than sixty percent of Americans are overweight and the Norwegian's firm in Miami, Florida is in the process of signing an agreement with US hospital giant Jackson Memorial. This deal would give Venøy & Co. around 11,500 litres of human fat a week from liposuction operations, which is enough to produce about 10,000 litres of bio-diesel.

"Maybe we should urge people to eat more so we can create more raw material for fuel," Venøy said.

Example of the Domino effect

This photo was taken by Nick Leigh who saw the bikes falling over outside the takeaway in East Finchley, North London.

Domino's Pizza

Domino’s said: “This was not a publicity stunt.”

Stripping is art, Norway decides

A Norwegian appeals court has ruled that striptease is an art form and should therefore be exempt from value-added tax (VAT).

The owners of the Diamond Go Go Bar in Oslo had refused to pay VAT of 25% on entry fees as tax authorities demanded.

Lawyers for the club's owners argued that striptease dancers were stage artists just like sword-swallowers and comedians and deserved the same status.

"Striptease, in the way it is practised in this case, is a form of dance combined with acting," the judges ruled.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Training

Flying

QashQai Car Games

I think this is about Nissan Qashqais.

There are six videos on this page, but the one that starts playing first is the strangest.

Contains adult language.

A puppy and a kitten

Fight!

And here's Gizmo, a cute little chihuahua.

'Tis the season to be scared witless

Actual English Subtitles Used In Films

Therapeutic Recreation for Horses, Pets and Zoological Foundations

Jewellery that says "I Hate You"

Cheeky Calenders

In the name of faith, hope and especially charity, will the people of Great Britain please put their clothes back on? This instant. Right now. Without delay. What we mean is, what has got into you all?

Cheeky girls

This year, the number of individuals willing to pose stark blooming naked for 2007 charity calendars has reached plague-like proportions.

From every corner of the nation, they come a-wobbling in front of the cameras wearing nothing but a frozen smile and a naked desire to do their bit for the charity of their choice.

And here are a few examples.

Alex Tew from the Million Dollar Homepage is back with a new idea

21-year-old Alex's new venture will turn one lucky web surfer into a millionaire. Again he will sell a million pixels as advertising space, but this time for $2 each.

He will get $1m and the other million will be given to one random visitor. One month after the final pixel is sold, a draw will select one of the site's adverts at random.

Someone who clicked on that particular advert will be picked via a second random draw. The next round of Pixelotto will then begin, giving someone else the chance to become a millionaire. The winner can also nominate a charity to receive a $100,000 donation.

The Pixelotto website only went live yesterday and already the prize fund is over $110,000.

I saw Alex interviewed a while back, and to say he was cocky would be an understatement. But then again maybe I'm just jealous.

Weird, wild and wonderful events of 2006

A selection of zany events from the year just ending.

Boy Arrested For Opening Christmas Gift Early

A South Carolina boy, 12, was arrested on Sunday morning after his mother called police to report that he had unwrapped a Christmas present without her permission.

Apparently the child opened a Nintendo Game Boy, though he had been directed not to by family members. When the boy's mother learned that the $85 gift had been opened, she called the police who charged the juvenile with petty larceny.

In an interview with The Herald newspaper, the boy's mother, a 27-year-old single parent, described her son as a disruptive child, noting that she hoped his arrest would serve as a corrective to disorderly behaviour at school and home.

Smoking Gun report.

£50,000 plasma TV is widest in the world

The Panasonic plasma screen — a monstrous 103 inches (8ft 7in) wide — went on display at John Lewis in Oxford Street in London at the weekend.



It is claimed to be the world’s biggest and costs £50,000 but that doesn't include installation.

It will cost as much as another £5,000 to get the quarter-of-a tonne TV delivered and set up.

Flatulence forces emergency landing

An American Airlines flight was forced to make an emergency landing Monday morning after a passenger lit a match to disguise the scent of flatulence, authorities said.

The Dallas-bound flight was diverted to Nashville after several passengers reported smelling burning sulfur from the matches. All 99 passengers and five crew members were taken off and screened while the plane was searched and luggage was screened.

The FBI questioned a passenger who admitted she struck the matches in an attempt to conceal a "body odour". She had an unspecified medical condition, authorities said.

The flight took off again, but the woman was not allowed back on the plane. The woman, who was not identified, was not charged in the incident.

Jail for nurse who threatened to cut off patient's manhood

A nurse has been jailed for threatening to cut off a patient's manhood with a pair of scissors.

Jean Lewis pushed 81-year-old William Thomas on to the floor, exposing his genitals.

Lewis then took out the large pair of scissors and began opening and closing the blades as she brandished them over his private parts.

The incident happened after Mr Thomas woke in the middle of the night at the Neuadd Drymmau nursing home in Neath, south Wales and asked 71-year-old Lewis for help.

Lewis, of Swansea, admitted assault and was jailed for 21 days.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Beachwear

Wheelchair BMX

This is fourteen- year-old Aaron Fotherington performing some incredible stunts with his wheelchair.

Including a backflip.

You've got to have respect for someone who can do this.

There's also a YouTube link here.

Many thanks Mike!

QVC Blunder

How many times has a friend called you and said ...

Contains adult language.

A cat called Winston eating mashed potatoes

Slim

I conquered anorexia

Breaking Wind

If you ever wondered what a fart filmed with an infrared camera looked like.

Here's your chance.

In the Womb Animals

This TV programme will be broadcast on the Natural Geographic Channel on Sunday.

Here is an extended preview.

David Ahmed Making Music

347 musical instruments.

Click on the names to see a photo and hear the instruments in action.

Arsonists warned not to kid around with Sweden's straw goat

Arsonists who enjoy burning down a festive Swedish straw goat may have met their match this year.

In the 40 years since the tradition started, the giant goat of Gavle has often gone up in flames within days.



But this year the 13-metre (43ft) high goat has a coat of flame-resistant chemicals, and the authorities are determined it will see in the New Year.

"No-one is going to get our goat this year", says a local spokeswoman with confidence.

Those who remain concerned can reassure themselves of the goat's wellbeing by watching on the "goatcam".

Fulla Nayak

I don't know what to make of this.

Yesterday, The Sun website posted this heartwarming story.

A great - great granny reveals how she has lived to be 120 ... by smoking CANNABIS every day.

Fulla Nayak – believed to be the world’s oldest woman – puffs “ganja” cigars and drinks strong palm wine in her cow-dung hut in India.

She lives with her 92-year-old daughter and grandson, 72, by the Indian Ocean.

Fulla said: “I don’t know how I’ve survived so long. Many relatives much younger than me have died.”

However, a quick Google news search reveals that she was 125 and died at her home in Orissa on November 18th, as reported here, here and here.

Surely The Sun wouldn't publish something that wasn't true?

Man sues for new foreskin

A German man who was circumcised against his will during emergency penis surgery is suing his doctor for cash to rebuild his foreskin.

Karl Spandl, 50, from Bonn was rushed to the Troisdorf Hospital for surgery after a painful abscess developed on his penis.

But while he was under the knife his doctor, unnamed for legal reasons, also chose to remove his foreskin to prevent complications.

Spandl said: "When I woke up I almost passed out again with shock. I never said they could take that. And now I have almost no feeling in the tip - my sex life has been totally ruined."

The mechanic is now demanding £14,000 from his surgeon for a second penis operation - this time to rebuild his foreskin using membranes taken from inside his mouth.

Busking lap dancer gyrates on metro-pole

A pretty pole-dancer is giving a new twist to busking and brightening up late-night journeys for commuters on Milan’s underground trains.

The girl, in her twenties and made up to resemble a cat, boards trains wearing a long black overcoat and carrying a portable stereo. When the doors close she throws off her coat and dances to the stereo in a black latex girdle with red silk ribbons, black fishnet stockings with pink ribbons around her thighs, black boots to just above the knee and shiny, black, fingerless gloves.

After a bump-and-grind routine using the carriage’s grab handles and vertical poles as props, she takes a collection and leaves the train.

Michela Proietti, a journalist, saw her when she was on her way home last Monday. She wrote in the daily Corriere Della Sera: “I was on the platform at the Porta Genova stationbetween 11.30 and midnight,” said Proietti. “She was very good looking and she had cat’s ears made of cloth.”

Ms Proietti received an avalanche of e-mails from readers who said they had seen the phantom lap-dancer on different days at different times and on other lines. Most said that it made a welcome change from the beggars and dubious musicians who normally inhabit Milan’s Metropolitana.