Friday, December 21, 2012

Woman reported stalking pigeon to police

A woman in the western German town of Darmstadt reported a pigeon to her local police force, after the over-friendly bird kept "stalking" her by hanging round her house. The exasperated woman told officers on Monday that the blue-grey pigeon had been a constant presence at her side for the past three weeks.

She said the "strange bird" had been hanging round in her garden or on her terrace constantly, and seemed to be looking for some kind of "familial connection." The woman claimed that every time she opened the door, the seemingly intelligent pigeon would immediately fly into the house. Her gentle attempts to persuade her unwanted guest to leave proved fruitless, as did her grandson's deployment of his water pistol.



Even once it had been chased out, the persistent pigeon would perch on a nearby branch and wait for the next opportunity to present its credentials as a potential companion. But the animal failed to recommend itself: when it did get in, the stubborn animal would "leave traces that no good housewife would want in her home," the police report said.

When the helpless woman finally went to the authorities, officers were unable to help her, and could only recommend that she seek the advice of a pigeon fancier or an animal psychologist. But then, before going to the professionals, the fraught woman decided to have another go herself. "Apparently, this time the bird received a clear 'dismissal' and flapped off on its own," the report concluded.

4 comments:

Ratz said...

Given the delightful weirdness of this site, I'm almost surprised this didn't turn out to be an article about how it turned out to be the soul of her grandfather in a pigeon.

arbroath said...

I'm sorry about that! :)

Anonymous said...

I was expecting the pigeon to end up in the oven.

Lurker111

Wirkman Virkkala said...

I ate a lot of pigeon soup when I was a kid. I expected a gustatory ending, too.